Slowly clambering out of bed, being careful not to wake my still sleeping hubby (hereafter to be known as my man). This was my second wake up, the first time, as I looked at the clock, I thought, “Nope, not today” and dozed for another 30 minutes. I love Saturday’s! Saturday – that one day that gives me a different routine from my Monday to Friday of work, meetings, girlfriend lunches, reading, studying, dreaming and just doing life.
Life in the fast lane, the turning lane, at the red light waiting for the green light, at the stop sign, or even pulled over, out the front of your house, with some blue lights brightly flashing behind you and a spot light glaringly invading your mirrors! A courtesy pullover I received this week … my license plate light was not working … glad the polite young officer told me, but did we really need all his lights lighting up the neighborhood? 😉 Checked yours lately? ($3 at Auto Zone). So how do you do it? Life, that is.
In 1963 a young married couple with two children, left their homeland of England, to travel to the small island nation of Singapore, at the tip of Malaysia. On a three year assignment from the Royal Air Force life was different, immersed in a foreign culture. Bumps in the road of their relationship, eventually led them to seek a better life in another country. Leaving the air force behind, parents and siblings in England, they now immigrated to Australia, with their three children. They tried, but they never could flatten out those bumps. After a time they each went their separate ways, finding a new life with someone else.
In 1982 a young married couple with 1 child and another on the way, left Australia where they had met and married, to go to America, his homeland. The wife had made a promise “wherever you go, I’ll go, your people, will be my people.” As she was walked through the airport terminal to board a plane that would take her halfway round the world, leaving family and country behind, an older woman walked beside her. As they approached the gate, she slipped a ring off her finger and put it in the hand of the younger woman, saying, “Now don’t cry, I love you.” The younger woman, swallowed the huge lump in her throat, glanced down at her hand, and put the ring on her finger. It was a ring she had long admired. It had been bought at an antique store in London, England, by the older woman on her first trip back to her homeland since leaving in 1963. It was also the time she joined her remaining siblings as they buried their mother. Phone calls and hand written letters filled with photos of a growing family had kept the older woman and her mother close. Now the younger woman would do the same. The circle of life.
Thirty one years later, the younger woman, returned to Australia to see her family. She had kept up with the phone calls, the letter writing and sending photos of her growing family. Excitement filled her heart at the thought of seeing those she had loved from a distance for so long: her father, a relationship that had been healed and restored over the years of communication; her oldest daughter, birthed in fear, restored in love, which in and of itself, is an amazing story, but that’s for another time! Hopes of seeing her brother and younger sister filled her mind. Would they want to see her? The long absent older sister, who didn’t really know them. Then the bonus visit with her oldest son and his wife, who had decided in their first year of marriage to move to Australia, the land of his birth. Then there would be the visit with the older woman, her mother, that carried with it all the emotion of knowing this indeed would be the last time they would see each other. She was very ill and her life was drawing to a close. Armed with the knowledge her daughter was coming to see her, the older woman bypassed a long held nagging fear that she would not see her daughter again.
So many emotions clamored and begged for the attention of the younger woman on that 14 hour flight – but one quieted and covered them all. That deep seated peace that had held her life together for 31 years, did so now, as she flew far above the ocean’s floor below. Life indeed is a circle.
For four days, for a few hours each day, mother and daughter laughed and cried, remembered and laughed and cried some more. They hugged a lot. Together they ate their favorite cakes and drank cups of tea….and talked about life. The good life they both had lived. Then, it was time to go. Just as that younger woman had walked through the airport terminal that day she, once again, lifted her head, pushed her shoulders back and hugged the older woman one last time, a little bit closer and a little bit longer. Walking out the door, she turned from what was and focused on what lay ahead. A life that needed to be carried on.
Life on earth stopped for the older woman, my mother, one month ago today.
So as I remember her today, I want to ask you, what distance is there in any relationship you have? Don’t let time, miles or words build up, write that letter, send some photos. Go ahead and make that phone call.
Love each other well and as much as you are able be at peace with all men.
Until next time